Today is a great day!
I am renewed.
I went on a journey
with my Pops,
to get my ADHD meds.
We had lunch at McDonald’s @ Pioneer Plaza.
We went to The Pig.
I picked up my scripts.
We had many varied discussions about:
Regan, Political things, Black Lives Matter, The Band, Baez, Folk, Blues, Ken Burns, Longmire, Work, Hunting, Existential things, Danville Train, and Riverwest affairs.
When I got up, I had
~3hrs sleep.
Bailey pooped in the bathroom.
I walked her.
Dad lent me $20.
I got cigs. It was nice.
I am now on my way to work.
The bus has no clock.
My phone died last week.
I may be late but I only have 1.5/4 attendance points;
So I can afford it.
I am excited to work.
I tooted 20mg.
I ate 20 more.
Tim and I discussed our current interests in literature:
Brothers Karamazov, Ulysses, Portriat of the Artist, Illiad, William Morris, Swift, Beowulf, etc.
Tim is a good brother.
I have begun to reassess my ambitions in art making. My previous drives will not carry me much further.
I am going to be a great painter.
I just need to focus and have self-discipline.
Meeting informally with professors over beer is where I learn best
I now know why I have stalled.
I am not deserved to continue unless…
I come to terms w/ S.W. and apologize.
He said,
“Just be your normal excited self and keep a good attitude.”
I forgot that…
I think I will seek him out tomorrow and apologize.
I must study tonight.
I think I have two exams tomorrow.
I will review my slides/notes and take new ones.
Draw and memorize.
~ Almost missed my bus stop ~
Got to work on time
Clocked in –
Began taking calls
@ like 17:02
Tomorrow I took off of work.
Zā, Eāā and I are going
to County to visit
Matt.
I am excited to see him,
even if he is in jail.
I hope he will be
the regular Matt I
know and love.
Not the strung out boy
I’ve seen for a few
times in the past
years –
The clock moves in
hypertime-
@7:30 the clock really slowed down.
It was relaxing.
Well I made it out of work.
I crafted a list of my sins.
I intend to confess
@ The bus Stop @ about 10:20
a homeless man asked for
cash. I said I couldn’t
give him any.
He said he wasn’t meaning trouble.
He asked for 3 cigs.
I said that was steep.
I gave him 5.
He sauntered away.
A regular.
He was foaming at the mouth,
probably on drugs,
his neurons weren’t firing right,
he was limping.
Poor soul –
Self-actualization was a concept
I learned and sought to abide
by long ago-
I forgot about it.
Blinded by my own arrogance.
To be the best version of
oneself, fulfilling potential

I have a long way to go
to redeem myself. I will have
to be careful in my actions.
I may have to sully myself again
a bit, to get back on track.
I should make course and follow through.