• Disclosing.

    I was drinking alone at Bremen, as I often did.

    She approached me.
    We started talking and never stopped.

    I clutched the same drink for 3 hours,
    too engaged in conversation.

    She told me much about herself. I dug it.

    She went to UWM for a degree in Microbiology.
    She uses Linux.
    She takes apart electronics.
    She’s into NES, Zelda, and Pokémon.

    She does stand-up and knows Guy Brown.
    In fact, she told me the comedy circuit calls her
    the “New Guy Brown”.

    She told me she was recently roofied in Chicago.

    She lives in Bayview and works in her field.

    We shared so much.

    By bar close, I tried to get her to come home with me, as young men do. She was much wiser than I and politely refused the offer.
    Nonetheless, we made out by the dumpsters.

    She said we shall meet again.

    I told her I wonder what I did to deserve such a perfect encounter.

    She told me I was just looking at her with drunk goggles.


    Two days later,
    after gathering my closest consorts,
    we met her again at Art Bar.

    She was standoffish!

    I waited patiently at a table in the back of the bar with my friends.

    Eventually,
    she came over and sat beside me.
    She talked to Mike and Jessie about Bayview things.

    She told me she had a poor experience tonight.
    That she could not engage her audience.
    I told her these things happen.

    We talked for some time.
    She could not understand when I called her an artist.
    She did not think her craft an art.

    Having previously read her birth chart,
    I noticed her Lion’s Pride was deeply bruised.

    I tried to show her that I was her equal
    and made use of my limited scientific knowledge.
    She noted that I was obviously
    trying to impress her.

    It was then that she turned face.
    She became the Dungeon Master
    and conducted a series of tests
    to gauge my will.

    Though my will was strong
    and my intent, mostly noble,
    my drunken heart
    trapped me in the labyrinth.
    As always.

    She told me she once loved a man
    and that they should have been wed,
    had she kept him.

    This correlated with what her birth chart
    had betrayed.
    That she was apprehensive to formalize bonds.

    She panicked when,
    I thought nothing of it.
    She told me,
    she had had a rough life,
    that she had to be
    an Adult,
    at an early age.
    She said,
    she was abused by men.

    To her,
    I tried to reassure
    of my sincere position
    and that
    judgements need not
    be applied.

    She let her will die,
    and realized
    she need not topple me.

    “I just laid a bomb on you. I have to go.”

    I tried, well enough,
    to have her stay,
    but there is no
    commanding of a Leo
    of her caliber.

    I asked
    at the very least
    if I could walk her
    to her car.

    She asked
    why am I
    so fixated
    on keeping her?

    I told her,
    I was just
    a love-sick dog
    who doesn’t like
    to let
    opportunity
    pass me by.

    I tried an alternative approach to ease her tension.
    She told me she doesn’t like to be pressured.
    I backed off.
    I cannot be with her if it is I who imposes will.
    I asked if I would see her again.
    She lied and said yes.
    Then we kissed, but the spark was dead.
    I could tell she was just pitying me.

    She started her car and drove out of my life.
    I walked home alone in gloom.

    No matter what I could have said or done,
    I could not convey my true heart.

    When we were still at the bar, she was bummed about her set.
    Aiden did the most miraculous thing.
    Appearing out of nowhere,
    he congratulated her on her set.


    A week has gone by,
    I have digested my thoughts.

    Yes, she was smart,
    and pretty,
    and dignified,
    and honorable,
    but
    I don’t think that
    a Leo like that
    and a Capricorn like me
    would ever have gotten on.
    I am the manager, and she is the commander.

    We both exhausted our efforts
    trying to twist each other
    to our wills.

    She was cunning of mind.
    She saw right through
    my boyish facade
    and to the old Devil inside.
    She saw my millennium.
    She had her own.

    I think she would be better suited
    with a more reasonable
    and responsible
    partner.

    Oh, but she would be a great Caleh.

    I would think there would be
    much prestige in
    taming a lion.

    But she would not be.
    She has places to be that I cannot follow.
    Our paths intersected but briefly.

    I am just a slave to Saturn’s cycles
    of lessons
    which I continually fail
    wrought self-destruction.

    I am a prisoner
    locked away
    in my own thoughts.

    No one can save me but myself.

    Besides,
    she finds no value in
    the interaction of
    the stars and heavenly bodies
    and all that correlates.
    She is scientific.

    She thought my Crux was stupid.

    That was it. Ghosted after that.


    Who will be my harmony?
    A love hath promised me.

    Maybe I am destined to sorrow.
    Come again, nothing tomorrow.

    If I were to stay here longer,
    my dismay grows ever stronger.

    Always and ever,
    the Universe is clever
    in fooling me.

    November 15, 2014
←Previous PageNext Page→